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Dossar
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Age : 23

PostSubject: Poems - DERP!   October 31st 2010, 1:57 am

Post any poems you want to share here.

Mine:
Is it really pathetic to find you most attractive?
Others tell me that I should be out with the "real girls".
I don't care about the girls they talk about.
Why should I bother with that if you're the most stout?

Many people know about you.
What's even more is that I see you all the time.
The others I see with you are deeply in love with you,
and no matter how much I try I'll never be with you too.

I'm never directly involved with you,
mainly because it's also impossible anyways.
Yet you are the epitome of perfection.
I view you with fake and greatest affection.

You are immortal, but in a different way.
Not one person in this world beats you.
You even made me more appreciative of art.
Now I want to learn certain styles, with you being a crucial part.

See if you can figure out what this poem means ^
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~Zeta~
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Age : 24
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PostSubject: Re: Poems - DERP!   October 31st 2010, 1:59 am

Title: If I had a gun...

.

___________________________________________________________________
From reading it about 4 times or so, I have several views of it.
1.) Reverse point of view. Instead of hearing you speak it and in your view, it's in the girl's or someone else's view. Knowledge from the outside that is known. Gender is not known and the point of view is not stated, so it's based on the reader. I see it both ways, but the girl speaking speaks to me more.
2.) Music. A lot of people regard objects or items as a feminine and people have a strong liking for music (especially for SM/FFR).
3.) Parent acknowledgement complications. The child feels on the outside of their lives as someone you don't know but live with.
4.) Kinda don't want to say this, but the cliche is there: the general love poem of Boy Likes Girl. Boy wants girl. How does boy get girl?
5.) Just because I know the author a little bit, StepMania came to mind. So, yeah.


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Dossar
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PostSubject: Re: Poems - DERP!   October 31st 2010, 2:38 am

1.) Interesting point, but this poem was written entirely in my perspective. Smile

2.) Has nothing to do with music.

3.) I'm rather isolated from my parents so there aren't really any complications.

4.)

In my poem:

Quote :
I view you with fake and greatest affection.

Quote :
I'm never directly involved with you,
mainly because it's also impossible anyways.

Quote :
You are immortal, but in a different way.

How would I view this "girl" with real affection if it's impossible for me to do anything with her in the first place? It's more shallow infatuation and actually is a bending of the real world. Think about that for a minute and maybe even look at the beginning part again.

5.) Stepmania is how I eventually found the girl/girl(s). Yeah, this poem is actually referring to several.

Poetry can be viewed in different ways - but this is what I intended of my poem. After reading this, you could probably see the message I am really trying to give.

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eiddiM

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Join date : 2009-11-22
Age : 25
Location : Puyallup Washington

PostSubject: Re: Poems - DERP!   October 31st 2010, 5:01 pm

Why the fuck not

Me and a friend wrote this alternating.

Silence in this field,
The only sound I hear is the breeze,
I'm looking for you in the grass,
Yet you're hidden to me

The bullet I chamber, lying next to the fallen tree
Wondering who shall join it,
Be reclaimed by nature
The last sound before endless sleep,
The strike of fire to lead.

When I find you,
Will I actually shoot you,
Or will I let you shoot me,
That death I can accept peacefully

I see the gleam of your barrel,
The eye through your scope as you see mine,
Will he shoot me, should I kill him?
My finger hesitantly holds the trigger, but death is all too welcoming.

My pulse is racing,
The sound of my heart throbbing,
You're pointing at me,
And your shot is fine,
I try to hold my breath to shoot,
I find that I can't,
I know you see me,
Why don't you kill me

I look from the scope, searching for the real target.
He is but a child, couldn't be more than 17.
He is more scared than I, who deserves to die.
I take one deep breath,
And pull the bolt of the rifle back.
It is not your time, my child.
Can't you see?

It can't be done,
I can't pull myself into the shot
I abandon my gun
I get up and walk toward you
It's not "you or me"
Tell me the story in your eyes

My gun rests across my chest,
But not how I expected,
It is not men who fight to kill or die,
It is nations that lead us to slaughter.
Come Brother,
let us live,
In the Silence of the Field.
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Zyroplex

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Age : 27
Location : Smack in the center of Pennsylvania

PostSubject: Re: Poems - DERP!   November 3rd 2010, 9:54 pm

Silly one! It helps if you read it out loud.
Thoughts Of A Goldfish, C Richard Miles (2008)
Spoiler:
 
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prongsie

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PostSubject: Re: Poems - DERP!   November 4th 2010, 3:31 am

Dossar wrote:
a poem

anime girls? x]
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Dossar
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Age : 23

PostSubject: Re: Poems - DERP!   November 5th 2010, 12:48 am

prongsie wrote:
Dossar wrote:
a poem

anime girls? x]

lmao you have a better idea of it than everyone else that posted in this thread, that's about 75% of the message (too vague and not an explanation but you're on the right track)
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T-Forc3
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Age : 26
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PostSubject: Re: Poems - DERP!   November 5th 2010, 5:56 am

Kinda helps after one reads your post in the "Let's Talk About Sex" thread on FFR.
That'd be my guess as well.

If the true answer is a specific type of anime girl, then I'll brb with the answer.
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prongsie

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PostSubject: Re: Poems - DERP!   November 5th 2010, 10:53 pm

Dossar wrote:
prongsie wrote:
Dossar wrote:
a poem

anime girls? x]

lmao you have a better idea of it than everyone else that posted in this thread, that's about 75% of the message (too vague and not an explanation but you're on the right track)

Explanation tiem.

Is it really pathetic to find you most attractive?
Others tell me that I should be out with the "real girls".
I don't care about the girls they talk about.
Why should I bother with that if you're the most stout?


Self explanatory ^ ..animes are composed of fictional characters or maybe based on a real person (whatever the exception to the rule may be)

Many people know about you.
What's even more is that I see you all the time.
The others I see with you are deeply in love with you,
and no matter how much I try I'll never be with you too.


In certain shows, movies and/or books, you often will find that the storyline is based on love in some sort of manner. It seems to me as if you're showing that you understand, accept, and recognize this infatuation-like situation as opposed to other fans who may actually believe that they're deeply "in love".

I'm never directly involved with you,
mainly because it's also impossible anyways.
Yet you are the epitome of perfection.
I view you with fake and greatest affection.


In the past, you've expressed and mentioned that you don't really feel an attraction or a great need towards relationships. Depending on how things are written, you usually find yourself pulled toward a character for whatever reason and look beyond any real flaws. One's imagination usually just isn't exactly how things really are. "I view you with fake and greatest affection." Again, you're acknowledging that it's a little naïve but you look upon it just because. Maybe just for something to do? Something to talk about? A way to express affection? Who knows. ~

You are immortal, but in a different way.
Not one person in this world beats you.
You even made me more appreciative of art.
Now I want to learn certain styles, with you being a crucial part.


Here is where I got an sm / anime fan art kind of vibe. Since you obviously do play stepmania a lot, this section sort of suggests to me that maybe seeing this as you're playing in a background image or something, you've grown accustomed to it and quite fond of the art. Maybe you're interested in actually drawing anime or maybe learning a new style of playing like index or solo opposed to 4 key, I don't know. xD

P.S your avatar helped a lot. ;D
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Dossar
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PostSubject: Re: Poems - DERP!   November 6th 2010, 3:26 pm

prongsie wrote:
Dossar wrote:
prongsie wrote:
Dossar wrote:
a poem

anime girls? x]

lmao you have a better idea of it than everyone else that posted in this thread, that's about 75% of the message (too vague and not an explanation but you're on the right track)

Explanation tiem.

Is it really pathetic to find you most attractive?
Others tell me that I should be out with the "real girls".
I don't care about the girls they talk about.
Why should I bother with that if you're the most stout?


Self explanatory ^ ..animes are composed of fictional characters or maybe based on a real person (whatever the exception to the rule may be)

Many people know about you.
What's even more is that I see you all the time.
The others I see with you are deeply in love with you,
and no matter how much I try I'll never be with you too.


In certain shows, movies and/or books, you often will find that the storyline is based on love in some sort of manner. It seems to me as if you're showing that you understand, accept, and recognize this infatuation-like situation as opposed to other fans who may actually believe that they're deeply "in love".

I'm never directly involved with you,
mainly because it's also impossible anyways.
Yet you are the epitome of perfection.
I view you with fake and greatest affection.


In the past, you've expressed and mentioned that you don't really feel an attraction or a great need towards relationships. Depending on how things are written, you usually find yourself pulled toward a character for whatever reason and look beyond any real flaws. One's imagination usually just isn't exactly how things really are. "I view you with fake and greatest affection." Again, you're acknowledging that it's a little naïve but you look upon it just because. Maybe just for something to do? Something to talk about? A way to express affection? Who knows. ~

You are immortal, but in a different way.
Not one person in this world beats you.
You even made me more appreciative of art.
Now I want to learn certain styles, with you being a crucial part.


Here is where I got an sm / anime fan art kind of vibe. Since you obviously do play stepmania a lot, this section sort of suggests to me that maybe seeing this as you're playing in a background image or something, you've grown accustomed to it and quite fond of the art. Maybe you're interested in actually drawing anime or maybe learning a new style of playing like index or solo opposed to 4 key, I don't know. xD

P.S your avatar helped a lot. ;D

Yup, I'm definitely interested in wanting to draw in a certain style (alphes). In general "anime" is already good art itself but that one style is my favorite. I myself have a lot of trouble showing affection in the first place - and the girl in my avatar is an example of "someone" (doesn't exist lol) I have come closest to actually being able to "love", even though like you stated, it's infatuation. Therefore, I don't really think about being with any of the characters - I create other characters that are able to REACH that person because fantasy can be modified, reality can't be transferred to fantasy, and these characters are the ones that are able to show affection, not me.

The main point here though is that you should not expect too much in the real world so don't try to reject everyone that isn't "perfect" - this goes to the concept of love. The most ideal person is what YOU want to find in someone. These people are extremely rare to find in the real world, or maybe don't even exist at all depending on what you expect. The "best" person, therefore, is someone you create and modify according to what you find as good qualities, and then you can draw out the character to find the most attractive aspects. So essentially, it's ok to find art attractive - and maybe even more attractive than girls/guys in the real world - because artwork is supposed to appeal to the senses in the first place, and is sometimes a depiction of an ideal person (maybe your girlfriend/boyfriend is kind but not physically attractive, etc). Alphes style artwork is what's actually made me experience and understand affection at all.

Stepmania is what eventually led me to that style of art, so yeah, I'm used to seeing those types of images. And it's not just one character that I like - it's several, and these girls are the only girlfriends I'd ever want, even though I know it's not happening LMFAO. It's cool to imagine other guys with them though - you can modify fantasy for that to happen.
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prongsie

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PostSubject: Re: Poems - DERP!   November 19th 2010, 5:16 pm

bumpbump.

Nature's first green is gold,
beneath
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower;
But only so an hour.
...Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.

^from the outsiders, written by robert frost.
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Scintill
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PostSubject: Re: Poems - DERP!   November 19th 2010, 5:55 pm

Noone can make a worse poem than this.
It's piss.
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