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kmay

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PostSubject: What is love?   September 13th 2010, 10:27 pm

what the title says. I'd like to see what everyone has to say
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 13th 2010, 10:30 pm

baby don't hurt me
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xBBx Takedown

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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 13th 2010, 10:32 pm

So you actually made a thread about this? To be honest, everyone does have their own opinion of love. It's basically love at first site with people but some others do not believe in this. I'm one of those people who do believe in that.
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kmay

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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 13th 2010, 10:35 pm

love in first sight... makes no sense. how can you love someone you know nothing about. how can you love someone that you arent sure can or will hurt you? love at first sight seems to be the type of love people feel when they havent actually been heart broken.

TBH i think the only people you can truly love are your family. mom dad sibling... the connection you can build with them is so strong. love isnt just wanting to be with someone its not wanting to be away from someone. love is not wanting the other part of the relationship to get hurt.
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 13th 2010, 10:38 pm

You never know what people think when they see the person they could possibly fall in love with. Love at first sight is very possible. You might not think that but other people think that. For example, I did have a gf I loved when I first met her. Am I wrong for that? I don't think I am. I think no one is wrong for their opinion of love.
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kmay

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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 13th 2010, 10:40 pm

its not 'wrong' its just naive. once you actually get heart broken you will become more guarded. love isnt something you can give away with quick look at someone. its the deepest emotion we have a human beings
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 13th 2010, 10:41 pm

There's no "definition" of love. It's passive. Not forced or limited. One of the unknowns that cannot be explained. Definitions define a word entirely; leaving no details out.


Also, there's a science behind love at first sight. There's a theory that people can recognize facial structure/proportions instantaneously without thought. Those proportions may be similar to a long lost love, parents, your own, etc. It's a click in the mind that reminds yourself of that face. It's along the eyes of picture memory.

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kmay

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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 13th 2010, 10:45 pm

thats not love at first sight mikey. thats people trying to fill a void.
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 13th 2010, 10:46 pm

"Love at first sight" translates to "Wanting to fuck at first sight". It's painfully true. While some people do happen to have their "first love" to be their spouse, it's usually just shallow infatuation (crush).

To me it's just a false excuse to try getting someone for the money, fame, etc. Just the thought of being married to someone is scary to me. Having to think of someone for the rest of your life (unless you get divorced) and being paranoid about that person finding out if you're also thinking about someone else.

The people that do believe in "love" should elaborate more on what they think about it.

By the way, liking someone is different than "loving" them. You can have a best friend who you hang out with and go to the movies etc. but not have any sexual feelings toward him/her.
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kmay

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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 13th 2010, 10:50 pm

To me love is when you see someone and you can help but smile. you can talk about anything and have it be interesting. you like to do the same thing as the other one and its not painful to do so. love isnt something you can throw out in a week. when it ends it hurts. hurts like something you cant describe. you are lost. love is letting someone into your deepest thoughts and feelings and being okay with that. lowering all walls you put up because you trust someone. then when they hurt you the walls come up twice as strong.
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 13th 2010, 10:57 pm

Love at first sight is just based on physical attraction, like dossar siad. To me, love is when someone else's life becomes more important then yours. It can be towards family or friends or that special someone. Whenever you know you'll be getting the short end of the stick but at least that other person will benefit.
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 13th 2010, 10:58 pm

♫♪ wrote:
baby don't hurt me

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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 13th 2010, 10:59 pm

kmay wrote:
To me love is when you see someone and you can help but smile. you can talk about anything and have it be interesting. you like to do the same thing as the other one and its not painful to do so. love isnt something you can throw out in a week. when it ends it hurts. hurts like something you cant describe. you are lost. love is letting someone into your deepest thoughts and feelings and being okay with that. lowering all walls you put up because you trust someone. then when they hurt you the walls come up twice as strong.

I honestly have no personal experience or thoughts on this, but this would just about sum it up for me (probably). Although I don't think you necessarily need to share interests with someone. If you don't share interests but you can still do something the other person is interested in even though you might hate it, then that would be even better (in my eyes).

dossar wrote:
"Love at first sight" translates to "Wanting to fuck at first sight".

I actually disagree with this (Not for a majority, but I don't think this is 100% true). With my personal experience, the more I've liked someone, regardless of how long I've known them or how little I know about them, the less I would want to do anything like that with them; although I will agree that it's more physical than anything else because you really don't know anything about said person.
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 13th 2010, 11:01 pm

yea but if you do activities you dont like eventually you will get aggravated no matter how much you 'love' the other person. it would be more beneficial to both people to be able to enjoy the same thing
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 13th 2010, 11:49 pm

Zero's thoughts on love:

I do believe that love exists, but most of the time I see all these couples around me that talk about love and I see the way they interact with one another. It's unhealthy and this is not what i see love to be. Of course those people tell me about some bullshit about how "Love = being able to get pass for fighting," but i draw a line somewhere, when enough is it enough. I know people who will constantly fight based on their personalities, and that will not change because one cannot change their own personality. Yet they continue to say how in love they are.

Brings up my next subject -

Love can be self-imposed. These people that constantly fight over stupid shit, I consider to not be love, but more or less they say they love each other because it makes their lives easier. They might like each other, yes, but that doesn't mean they love each other, but it is the easiest way to get out of confrontations. I mean most men say "I love you" to their lady because they feel almost an obligation to say it back. And constantly using this, will lead to a self-imposed love. You say it so much that it becomes second nature and you actually believe your in love.

Love at first sight for me personally is a myth, and its rather impossible. It sounds like some fairy-tale movie bullshit. Dossar made a good point about wanting to fuck someone = love at first sight, but no, i totally disagree with that. I mean I wanted to fuck so many chicks based off first sights i must have been in love like 1000 times. On this topic I would have to agree with kmay its rather impossible to instantly like someone upon first glance. I mean did you fall in love with their shoes, their clothes, their giant breasts hanging out of their shirt. Its impossible this is simply a physical attraction and for the most part =/= love because their personality may not being to your liking

Love for me is undefined as of now, I will let you now my accurate definition when i find it. The problem is that there is like no pure indication of when someone is in love or not. That is decided by the person, so I might never know if I am love. I might be happy with someone, so I could assume I am in love, but its one of those terms where assumptions are allowed. So true there are people who can fall in love quickly (at least getting to know the person), but that is because they either haven't taken the time to identify what they truly believe is love or that person filled their definition perfectly and were able to make such a radical claim.

I probably repeated myself a bunch of times, but w/e

tl;dr: Love is undefined
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 13th 2010, 11:56 pm

Ah love so many different forms and meanings to it.

Well lets start at the love at first site thing. Now to some people this is a very stupid concept but love at first sight doesn't really mean like 1st glance. Moreso what it is, is body language the way the person carries themselves it gives off a certain emotion to some. They feel they can get to know a lot about someone just from that alone. Personally I am someone that can read people very well I don't need words to get to know someone. There are a lot of people that believe in auras and vibes and to some of you that's dumb and that's fine it's your belief but don't knock someone for theirs. But for those who believe in it they fall in love with that persons aura or vibe.

Then of course there's family/friend love. The people you have been exposed to if not all but most of your life. You develop a spot in your heart for them no matter what. It's not that burning love but I really don't think I need to get into it because I'm sure you all know what it feels like.


Then there's just love, Your 1st love or any relationship you may have had that you say I love you and feel that certain feeling. Now some people say that if you end up falling out of love you never loved that person to begin with but that's not true. The love you had for them was still a form of love but it wasn't that forever kind of thing. Which is normal and everyone goes through it. You can't tell someone they never loved just because they aren't with that person anymore cause sometimes things just happen.


Then there's the true love/forever love some people think they have it when they don't and sometimes they do. You can't really know for sure till an extended period of time goes by. But to me this is when you wake up and the person is the 1st thing on your mind and is the last thing on your mind when you go to sleep. You can't picture a day in your life without this person in it. Also a big big thing a lot of people in relationships will still tend to think about being with other people or previous loves if you think those things when you're with someone chances are you aren't feeling true love. I used to always end up thinking about prior people I had been in love with or whatever but now that I have Aj that doesn't happen anymore. I truly can't picture a day in my life without him and I actually trust him 100% which I never trust anyone that much cause it's just how I am. You really can't even put into words how it is you just kinda know when it's the real thing the forever kind of thing. And when I 1st went to write this message I had a whole bunch of stuff in mind now I forgot it lol gg me. If I remember I'll make another post XD

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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 14th 2010, 12:42 am

In my opinion, love is caring about what happens to someone. Nowadays, people use "love" very casually. If someone is dating a person, they say they automatically love them (Not all the time, but you have to admit, it DOES happen a lot.) Yes, sometimes this CAN be true, but it can also NOT be true. Now then, I just said I thought love was caring about what happens to someone. That's my MAIN definition. There are many others, but that is the simplest and easiest way to put it. Obviously, it can go much, much deeper than that. It goes on to the person you want to marry and spend the rest of your life with, etc, etc.

Anyway, this is why I believe you can love your friends, family, spouse, etc, without having to be IN love with them.
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 14th 2010, 12:49 am

Saphira wrote:

Well lets start at the love at first site thing. Now to some people this is a very stupid concept but love at first sight doesn't really mean like 1st glance. Moreso what it is, is body language the way the person carries themselves it gives off a certain emotion to some. They feel they can get to know a lot about someone just from that alone. Personally I am someone that can read people very well I don't need words to get to know someone. There are a lot of people that believe in auras and vibes and to some of you that's dumb and that's fine it's your belief but don't knock someone for theirs. But for those who believe in it they fall in love with that persons aura or vibe.

aura's and vibes wouldnt be considered 'first site' because a lot of people look differently then they act. like me. aurus are just the type of spirit you have. thats nothing to fall in love with an vibes , or first impressions, can always be changed. Love at first sight is what it means. you see them and think... hmm OMG I LOVE YOU. thats first sight in any meaning. then theres the occasional glimpse of something you like and you start talking which leads to dating. nothing is love at first site. its just impossible to feel that emotion we lock inside so deep with a simple glimpse
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 14th 2010, 12:49 am

wtf??? so much for editing??
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 14th 2010, 12:59 am

kmay wrote:

aura's and vibes wouldnt be considered 'first site' because a lot of people look differently then they act. like me. aurus are just the type of spirit you have. thats nothing to fall in love with an vibes , or first impressions, can always be changed. Love at first sight is what it means. you see them and think... hmm OMG I LOVE YOU. thats first sight in any meaning. then theres the occasional glimpse of something you like and you start talking which leads to dating. nothing is love at first site. its just impossible to feel that emotion we lock inside so deep with a simple glimpse


Auras and vibes are 1st site how are they not? If you're that type of person that's what you see. Just the type of spirit you have which shows the kind of person you are. Good people have bright auras whereas bad ppl have darker auras. A vibe is a certain feeling you get around someone some people feel they are very in touch with this and can know what a person is like just by that vibe. Don't say something is impossible just because YOU haven't experienced it yourself.

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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 14th 2010, 1:13 am

Saphira wrote:


Auras and vibes are 1st site how are they not? If you're that type of person that's what you see. Just the type of spirit you have which shows the kind of person you are. Good people have bright auras whereas bad ppl have darker auras. A vibe is a certain feeling you get around someone some people feel they are very in touch with this and can know what a person is like just by that vibe. Don't say something is impossible just because YOU haven't experienced it yourself.

i get what you're saying, about the whole aura thing all though i can't pick up on it myself. I'm not gonna say I don;t believe in it because frankly, how the hell should i know? If i can;t see it maybe I'm just not in touch with myself or something. I don;t know. But i understand having that feeling about people, being able to tell who they are by just how they act, reputation does procede you and even if you know nothinbg about soemone, just watching them for a couple minutes can tell you what kind of mood they are in and possibly how they look at life. Now, provided you've pciked up on these hints correctly, you may be attracted to how you see there outlook on life, but really, until you talk to them and spend some actual time around them, involved with them, I cant say that what youre feeling is justified. Its all based on a hunch, which could be right or wrong. IMO.
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 14th 2010, 1:21 am

Here's a question for you. How many people actually act like themselves when they are getting to know someone that they like? Almost none we all put on our best face to seem great to the person. So it's pretty much the same as saying someone falling in love with someone they don't really know because the sad truth is people don't reveal their real self till they are comfortable.

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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 14th 2010, 1:29 am

If anything love is something everyone needs, and of course we're not just limiting to relationships and all that. Friends, family, close people, even acquaintances are all sources of love. To me, love overrules anything like money, fame, wealth, death, you name it. Without love, where will you all be? Love is like a train ticket that you give to others to find out who you truly are. This is why many people find true love fascinating, we all discover things we would never have imagined without love. Love is like a train ride filled with hopes, dreams to be fulfilled, and happiness, but most importantly, a chance to find out who you are.

This is why finding someone you truly love is important. Can you see yourself in his/her eyes? Can you see yourself spending your entire life with him/her? Because we don't truly know another person, we attempt to find qualities that are similar to yours. Many people might believe in "love at first sight," but I don't. Love begins with some friendship, then upgrades to a relationship and so on. Because many people tend to "love at first sight," do you let these feelings win over the fact that you would like to know this person before considering? That's only up for you to decide.

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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 14th 2010, 1:39 am

Saphira wrote:
Here's a question for you. How many people actually act like themselves when they are getting to know someone that they like? Almost none we all put on our best face to seem great to the person. So it's pretty much the same as saying someone falling in love with someone they don't really know because the sad truth is people don't reveal their real self till they are comfortable.

well i would say your right for most people, but using myself as an example, im always myself. Im comfortable with myself, i get angry i feel depressed sometimes, hell sometimes i feel worthless, but i move foward and always have good intentions. Thats just the way i am.
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 14th 2010, 2:35 am

Love has many different forms. Kayla put it best. There's family /friend love, puppy love (to put it bluntly), and true love.

They all have their risks and rewards. And yes, it's true you can be hurt seriously by them, it's still nothing compared to the joy and memories created beforehand.

Love is a strange thing. The person whom you love can do the oddest things to you. The slightest smile can send your heart ablaze. Fill it up with such powerful emotion, that it's almost unexplainable. Sometimes it's wanted, sometimes it's not. It can be towards someone you barely know (although that's just hope, really. Hope that they won't be the biggest bitch/asshole on the planet and you basically replacing their personality with a fabricated one) or someone you know better than yourself. They pop into your mind at the most random of times and you always seem to smile.

Love is accepting someone else's burdens and making them as important, if not more, than your own. Their pain is yours, and you know they'll do the same. It's accepting someone for who they are and not wanting to change one aspect of them. It's imagining them and being able to remember every little detail about them. You'll know them better than yourself.
And the weird thing about this? You're happy about it.
They're the ones you go to first and foremost. About anything and everything.

And amidst the heartache and heartbreak of life, they're the ones with the pot of glue and the roll of duct tape ready to patch you up.

Sure you'll have your spats here and there. But it's how you handle them and if you feel like staying even after what may seem like World War III: The Verbal War has just occurred, you always want to make things right.

If it's something you may not want, that's fine. But love is the biggest bitch and the sweetest person. The roughest thorn, and the most beautiful rose. It's the biggest leap of faith you'll take. And depending on how far you want to jump is up to you.

All I can say is love is something I want to experience. To the full. So I'm diving 10 feet below to experience everything. I may not be a risk-taker in terms of other events, but this is something I know I want to experience to the full.

There.
*tosses two pennies down*
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 14th 2010, 3:53 am

As Trevor has thrown his two cents in I guess I’ll toss in mine. Some of this will be reaffirming what I agree with other people saying and so on. I suspect someone’s gonna pick this post apart though.
I guess I’m just gonna go down post by post.

What “love” is completely depends on how we look at it (as Robbie said I completely agree with it.) To me “love” is a bond developed for another person that is specific, and must be attained through time with and away from this person. “Love” to each person is its own, no one is wrong, no one is right. This “emotion” is not comprehensible to anyone.

As Kmay doesn’t believe in “love” at first sight, based off the fact it makes no sense. This I agree with; as “love” can’t be formed based off looking at someone and judging them off the spot. I mean how could you possibly know you will get along with someone or “love” something based off what you see? “Love” is more like a bond formed in time, whether it is a “love” of something, someone or a feeling we can’t ever hope to comprehend. Now someone might say they “love” a person’s body, or something about their appearance. This is also something that can’t be true, based off the fact how would you know your exact preference based off a first glance and such. You never know what you like the most until you dabble around in the selection pool.
xBBx Takedown wrote:
For example, I did have a gf I loved when I first met her. Am I wrong for that? I don't think I am. I think no one is wrong for their opinion of love.
Robbie before I can analyze this I’m inclined to ask you how long you knew her before you “loved” her. Because as I think it is a bond formed through time and experience, I can’t argue for or against you here.
xBBx Takedown wrote:
I think no one is wrong for their opinion of love.
This however I can agree with. While I think people who do think “love” at first sight is possible are foolish, to each their own. Z also supports this.
Z goes on to say
~Z~ wrote:
Also, there's a science behind love at first sight. There's a theory that people can recognize facial structure/proportions instantaneously without thought. Those proportions may be similar to a long lost love, parents, your own, etc. It's a click in the mind that reminds yourself of that face. It's along the eyes of picture memory.
This actually I think supports my argument that “love” is a bond formed in time. Because to recognize something you’ve had to experience it correct?
Now Doss brings up a funny, but interesting point to “love” at first sight.
Dossar wrote:
"Love at first sight" translates to "Wanting to fuck at first sight". It's painfully true. While some people do happen to have their "first love" to be their spouse, it's usually just shallow infatuation (crush).

I agree that sometimes it does translate to wanting to “fuck at first sight” as that is what our hormones can be screaming at us. Marrying the first person we “love” can be a “shallow infatuation” but I think it is more likely what Doss also mentions in his post as “A false excuse…” But then again, you do not “love” the person; you love what they can give you. That is not “love” that can be more of greed and other such feelings/addictions/other stuff.

~Zero~ wrote:
I do believe that love exists, but most of the time I see all these couples around me that talk about love and I see the way they interact with one another. It's unhealthy and this is not what i see love to be. Of course those people tell me about some bullshit about how "Love = being able to get pass for fighting," but i draw a line somewhere, when enough is it enough. I know people who will constantly fight based on their personalities, and that will not change because one cannot change their own personality. Yet they continue to say how in love they are.
I agree at times – the sight of what other people think is “love” is utterly repulsive. It can be unhealthy in our minds, but with each failed attempt comes another more prominently accurate one I think. The phrase “live and learn” is sort of a phrase for this situation.
Now Kayla has put it best so far.
Saphira wrote:
Ah love so many different forms and meanings to it.
Then of course there's family/friend love. The people you have been exposed to if not all but most of your life. You develop a spot in your heart for them no matter what. It's not that burning love but I really don't think I need to get into it because I'm sure you all know what it feels like.
There are many kinds of “love”, I’ve sort of touched on this by separating it by “person/object” But Kayla has gone a step further. Separating families, friends and such and I agree with her wholeheartedly on the fact being related develops a spot in your emotions for them, and being the people you talk to everyday are also going to gain a spot as well. I also think that you can “love” an object, or even something as farfetched as a feeling and emotion someone gives you.
Saphira wrote:
Then there's just love, Your 1st love or any relationship you may have had that you say I love you and feel that certain feeling. Now some people say that if you end up falling out of love you never loved that person to begin with but that's not true. The love you had for them was still a form of love but it wasn't that forever kind of thing. Which is normal and everyone goes through it. You can't tell someone they never loved just because they aren't with that person anymore cause sometimes things just happen.
I disagree on the fact people think you “fall out of love” with someone. The fact it is not as prominent as before might be fact, but love is a bond, the fact you “loved” them means you forever will, it just might not show anything close to as it has in the past. I agree you can’t tell a person they have never “loved” because it looks to have fallen apart, but deep inside it is still there. I would think.
Chances are I’ve contradicted myself, sputtered some analytical shit, or just wrote a post that utterly adds nothing – I’m not sure, but that’s just some of my thoughts, misguided or accurate as they are. Hopefully this helps or something.
My final statement is that “love” shouldn’t be a challenge of maintaining/keeping the person or object, “Love’s” challenge is to expand the feeling the person/object gives you. Whether it is happiness, joy, content, or something else.

I think that was SLIGHTLY more than two cents?
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 14th 2010, 3:56 am

Meh, you tossed in a nickel.
However, yeah. I'll agree you never stop loving someone.
To put it in the usual analogy of fire, there's always going to be the sparks.
However, some may only be small cinders while others can be roaring infernos.
And they can swap back and forth just as easily as you and I can have a game of catch.
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 14th 2010, 7:56 am

hmm im surprised no one as link love and hate yet...


and yes love is different to everyone, but it has a general consensus.

so far we all agree that it is a bond with family friends objects.

but we cant agree if its over time, or at first sight.
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 14th 2010, 5:25 pm

That's the thing. It can be both.
Sometimes it can occur at first sight and strengthen over time.
Others, there may be nothing upon first contact. But getting to know them better and being let in, as well as letting them in, may cause you to start falling in love with them.

Also, I really don't know how to establish a connection between love and hate.
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Scintill
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Age : 25
Location : Netherlands

PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 14th 2010, 5:33 pm

I've asked several people what it's like to feel love, and everything they described never happened to me, and I've had 7 girlfriends so far. Probably explains why it never worked out.
I might not have this "love" in me, which is kind of frightening.
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T-Forc3
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PostSubject: Re: What is love?   September 14th 2010, 5:58 pm

I'll bet...
But it's my personal opinion that everyone does.
It may be hiding a lot farther down inside of you than it may be for most, but you'll find it one day.
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